March 10th

I wrote this earlier this month, but never posted it. So here is our other big news!

It has been a busy week.

We found out we are moving this summer. I've been hesitant to say anything because we still don't have official orders. But really, with the military, until you've unpacked at the other end it's never a sure thing.

We are heading to the East Coast, Dover AFB in Delaware to be exact. The base where our Air Force journey began almost 10 years ago. How is it possible it's been that long already?

Jared is going back to the world of AMC (air mobility command) and flying the C17 once again. He is thrilled and nervous, as am I. He's nervous about learning to fly again. I'm nervous about returning to the pace of having him gone from home frequently with two little ones. But we're both thrilled to have him doing something he loves again; it makes the hard parts easier.

We're also excited to be in the same time zone as most of our family, and within a half days drive.

We weren't sure when he was assigned to the globalhawk if we'd ever see a "real" airplane or another flying assignment again. So this is momentous news. Fantastic news.

That said, it's also immediately distressing news. Because in less than 6 weeks he's headed back to our home away from home, Altus AFB in Oklahoma to begin almost 3 months of re-training. I know that he's anxious about getting back into a cockpit after more than 3 years, and the learning curve that entails. He's the only one though; he's brilliant and I know without a doubt after his first flight or two he'll settle back in and be amazing. As always.

The biggest wrench for me is that he's going to be leaving a baby only a few weeks old, leaving me without his immense help and support, leaving C who is already going to be dealing with a lot of life change. Basically our family glue is being taken away just at a moment we most need him. And that's hard. I'm sure it's hard for him as well; I know he doesn't want to leave us either.

I'm not going to lie; I've cried a lot about it in the past few days. Attribute it to the situation in general or pregnancy hormones, it doesn't really matter. It just stinks. I hate it right now.

On the bright side this is a quick exit from ND. Definitely not spending another winter in the subarctic tundra. Not even really another summer. We are lining up our amazing families to come out and help me into May and then the kids and I are heading to Ohio until J is finished with school. We'll come back and pack up our house and be gone. Hopefully find a new home and be able to settle in by the end of July.

We are hoping to have the second part of summer together, without looming upheaval and separation. We're looking forward to a chance to settle into a new home, a new normal, and to get to be a family of 4 together.

I'm praying when we arrive in Delaware the first words we hear aren't "deployment".

I know in the grand scheme of things this is just a hiccup. In the military world this isn't unheard of, not even particularly traumatic. But right now it seems so big and ugly and hard in our little world.

Please keep us in yours prayers. That baby would come early and healthy and we'd have a peaceful time together as a new family before J leaves. That my recovery would be smooth. That C would adapt well. That we would all feel peace in a situation that seems turbulent.